It is was regular school day at National University of Singapore, it was during my PH2206, Founders of Modern Philosophy class, and due to the nature of the subject, there was quite heated up discussion about the topic that day. I was watching my watch very closely, sitting near the back, and smiling with mirth at the ongoing argument. You see, on every Thursday, I have a dace practice soon after lesson and I didn’t want to be late. Then, it was 8 o’clock, then 5 minutes later, and yet, no one, was standing up to leave, and the teacher seemed too amused by some person’s argument. It now seems that there is an interesting phenomenon going on, something unique to Singapore, something, perhaps unique to other countries as well, that is not be found in America. We seem to have a penchant for not leaving until we are dismissed from class, and it has to be in an explicit way such as “class, you are dismissed” or “oh, it’s the end of class, you may leave if you wish to”. Otherwise, it is something unsaid that the class continues.

A few weeks ago, the teacher had noticed this strange phenomenon, which I’m not sure why it happens, and pointed out that we can leave once the lesson is ended, and you don’t need to ask for permission to leave. But, for some odd reason, this phenomenon still exists. This is most puzzling indeed.

I do believe I am living The Life right now. Everything is perfect. ( I don’t see failing chemistry as much of a setback) maybe it’s just because I don’t see anything as a failure, there’s always something good to gain at the end of every experience, no matter how bad it felt.

Life’s been one performance after another.

Rag, Rendezvous then Halloween. But it’s over, and I get temporary respite before Hall 11 during the hols. No, this is not good, because, what it means it that I’m having a study break! This sucks!

Long Essay for PH2207, Hume & Kant due on Monday. Then I’ve got to finish the short story for physics ( which I suck at, but at least I’m passing, so that’s good).

I’m walking on air…~

Considering taking dance classes during the hols and if my schedule permits, either Blast or Synergy next semester. Hm… I wonder.  I hope someone uploads concert or Halloween videos on youtube soon! I wanna watch myself. Funny isn’t it? How I fail to watch performances in hall because I’m too busy performing?

Hope springs eternal alright, and I still hope to be a decent dancer someday.  Talent is important, but what is more important than talent, is effort. Really.

Now, perhaps I’m getting ahead of myself, but I think I’m some masochist or something, I’m beginning to think taking 6 modules again next semester may not be such a bad idea after all. If at least 2 are non-science, I’m sure I can cope.

My tennis skills really leave much to be desired, but I’ll train harder during the hols to make up for it. And atheletics… I wonder…  hm…

I know I’m certainly not biting off more than I can chew. This is all perfectly acceptable. *sigh*

Without activities, my days and nights would be empty, as I wish upon a star. With you, I rest a lot more easily. But my dreams are young and we both know, it’ll take us where we want to go.

Yes,  all’s right in the world, and I am not bothered.

I guess this is the once-in-a-long-time emo session…

*sigh* sometime I wonder, what for. Why I’m I doing all the things I do. But don’t get me wrong, I actually have a much straightened out mind. I’m clear of my objectives and stuff. I am purposeful and dare-I-say… strong?

Well, this is pretty much what is happening nowadays…

And I guess I’m losing focus of my meaning in life.

Who am I kidding? Who I portray myself to be, it should be me. I am honest as day, or maybe it’s blunt. I tend to exaggerate and reiterate. But I rarely lie. Am I ashamed of who I am? Perhaps. Maybe I should be less honest, maybe I shouldn’t show so much of myself… perhaps I am self-centered and selfish and evil. Then again, I might be too harsh with myself. I something think too highly of myself- no, it’s not called pride, but high expectation. I don’t show much disappointment, but I am. I am too easily disappointed. But hope spring eternal, I keep telling myself, and the euphoria that it brings… it is something I am loathe to be rid of.

I have clear goals, and I know what i should and not do. I don’t regret, I pause to weep, but move on… would this appear to be heartless and uncaring of the people around me? I could care less. This is not about appearances, but about being true to myself. I can’t lie to myself, but the truth hurts. And somewhere in the little corners of one’s mind maybe scurrying like rats when a cat’s around, the truth lingers. One simply cannot lie to himself. It is simply not done.

Pray tell. Only time can tell. The prophecies of the humming-bird, they sing through the still night, and I can’t help but wonder, what they foretell…

-Yuna-

It’s been a while, I admit, and it is not without good cause. I’ve been busy like hell since school started, so here’s a recap.

I moved in to Raffles Hall, located opposite YiH 1 week before orientation. And soon after joined Rag Dance 08/09 as… Emily!!! You can search on youtube to find videos of me acting, dancing and generally looking nothing like myself ( with all the thick stage make-up).

Then lessons started. The following are my modules this sem:

CM1121 – Basic Organic Chemistry ( not very basic afterall)

LSM1103 – Biodiversity  (really fun, with lots of field trips to the zoo, beach and what not)

ST1232 – Statistics for Life Science

PH2207 – Hume & Kant ( yeah. Just that. I’m still a convinced Kantian)

PC1325 – Einstein’s Universe & Quantum Mechanics ( it is as cheem as it sounds)

SP2170 – Doing Science ( for Stupid Program people who are obviously so dumb they don’t already know how to do science… okay fine, I’m the only dumb one)

Yes, this does mean 24MCs, and an overload of 1 module. ( like shit!)

Oh well, chemistry just sucks, not a single lesson as gone without me falling asleep! And M&Ms are my best friend now. Despite the China Milk Scandal, my chocs are from US, so it’s fine, I think.

Then before life could settle down, concert started. I admit, I got psycho-ed by Liren’s Concert Cast is soooo fun talk. I actually intended for fundraising.

Yups, so dear NUS peeps, if you’re free, do catch my show, Rendezvous at UCC 7pm on 17 & 18 Oct 08. I’m playing Mrs Elizabeth Peach.

We’ve been practicing really hard, yup, and we’ve been sacrificing lots of time for it… yeah. So… yups.

Oh, and btw, the following are my CCAs

1)      Concert

2)      Dance – I know you think I can’t dance… well, at least I’m working hard for it!

3)      Tennis – hm… singles?

4)      Athletics – still not sure what I’m specializing in…

5)      SAVE???

Concert Cast:

Elizabeth Peach – Me

James Peach – Calvin

Colonel Black – Derek

Miranda Peacock – Ruen Qing

Gabrielle Scarlett – Arthi

Abigail AKA Abby – Li Ling

Michael Slate-Grey – Jensen

Henry Wilkins – Ryan

Jane Plumley – Su Bee

Phineas  Blanche – John

Josephine Blanche –  San Lee

Madeleine Brown – Joanna

Archie Brown – Jia Long

Aiden Brown – Chee Chong

Ian Merlin Green - Brandon

Wow! The very fact I struggle to remember their real names is really cause for concern… we’ve been in cast for too long!

This Friday is Changi Beach, followed by BEEP test and cast again… Saturday, Tennis… *sigh* “ the very thought could make one cry”…~  gee, we’re like quoting each other’s lines day in and day out… this is terrible! And my mental music are my songs…

Man, I need sleep…

Signing Off…

YuNa

[ ] the dark
[ ] staying single forever
[ ] being a parent
[X] giving birth
[X] being myself in front of others
[ ] open spaces
[ ] closed spaces
[X] heights
[ ] dogs
[ ] birds
[ ] fish
[X] spiders
[ ] flowers or other plants
Total so far: 4

[ ] being touched
[ ] fire
[ ] deep water
[X] snakes
[ ] silk
[ ] the ocean
[X] failure
[ ] success
[ ] thunder/lightning
[ ] frogs/toads
[ ] my boyfriend's/girlfriend's dad
[ ] boyfriend's/girlfriend's mum
[ ] rats

[X] jumping from high places
[ ] snow
Total so far: 7

[ ] rain
[ ] wind
[ ] crossing hanging bridges
[X] death
[ ] heaven
[X] being robbed
[X] falling
[ ] clowns
[ ] dolls
[ ] large crowds of people
[ ] men
[ ] women
[ ] having great responsibilities
[ ] doctors
[ ] tornadoes
Total so far: 10

[ ] hurricanes
[X] incurable diseases
[X] sharks
[ ] Friday the 13th
[ ] ghosts
[X] poverty
[ ] Halloween
[ ] school
[ ] trains
[ ] odd numbers
[ ] even numbers
[ ] being alone
[X] becoming blind
[X] becoming deaf
[ ] growing up
Total so far: 15

[x] creepy noises in the night
[X] not accomplishing my dreams/goals
[ ] needles
[ ] blood
[ ] dinosaurs
[ ] the welcome mat
[ ] high speed
[ ] throwing up
[ ] falling in love
[ ] super secrets
Final Total: 17

If you wish to post this in your journal, it's been requested that you title it "I'm afraid of _ out of 72 common fears"
If you get more than 30, counseling is strongly recommended.
If you get more than 20, you’re paranoid.
If you get 10-20, you are normal.
If you get 10 or less, you’re fearless.
People who don’t have any are liars.